Tuesday, May 01, 2012


It is Monday afternoon and I am sitting in the Chicago airport with the next two hours and forty five minutes (which turned into over four hours) completely to "myself." In some ways that is a completely ridiculous statement because there are thousands of other people swarming around me.  Time to ourselves is relative, yes?

You won't read these words today because I am too cheap (smart?) to spend $4.95 an hour for wifi. And, I am disturbed with how many will and how many glowing screens surround me including the one on my lap where I am typing these words.

The other thing is that is has been seven or eight days since I have processed in written words though I have written posts in my head since then. The bottom line is, I'm re-entering life and that requires processing in and of itself. My fingers are itching and the words are tumbling around in my head.

To top all of that off, I've been reading Jen Hatmaker's book, "7" and it is making the voice inside my head sassy and yet also hitting a chord in something that has been brewing just beneath the surface for a while now.  She is edgy and somewhat rude and disrespectful but she is also making sense. I have laughed out loud, blushed and been shocked by her self-professed "inapprorpriateness." Yet, it is still working its way into my brain and heart.

For example, she completely covers my struggles in buying organic local food. My thrifty self can hardly bear the thought of spending more for eggs but my local self sees the wisdom in not spending all of the money and time shipping it to me. I want to eat more naturally found food without hormones and antibiotics added, yet it takes more time, costs more and of course tastes better and is better for us. What is a shopper to do?

Is this entire conundrum why I walked to the post office this morning with my sweet sister and two adorable (one sleeping and one chatting up a storm) nieces to mail home a box of clothes for Samuel and books which cost $11 and will use infinitely more fuel and resources than if I had brought them on a checked bag which would have cost $25 but not incurred any extra expense or time? Life is mixed up when these kinds of decisions are our norm.

Deviating from that, I was so pleased that when I walked up to airport security, the female attendant commented on my cute shirt which I felt mentally compelled to tell her was $1 and my sister gave it to me for my birthday and paid for it by bringing in clothes to her local consignment store and trading. It gave me immense pleasure that I had this on with an Old Navy cable knit sweater in my favorite grey (grey days, grey clothes, etc... if I were a color would it be grey?) that I found at Goodwill and have worn for the past five days straight in order to avoid aforementioned baggage cost. I also had on a $1 pair of adorable and comfy red shoes  (that are also muddy from my sister and niece tromp through the Community Garden to deposit compost collections) that make life happier and were a gift from my dear blog friend, Angie, and a dark pair of blue jeans that I bought last summer with a Groupon deal.  Incidentally, all I said to the attendant was, "thank you."

I want to share pictures with you, tell you about seeing October Baby and how it spoke to me, admit that instead of typing all of this I should be planning for what needs to happen the rest of this week and how I am looking forward to my parents visiting this weekend. But sometimes things just rises to the surface and need to be out of my brain before I can move on. This is exactly why I process in words in the first place. It gets things out of my head where they drive me bananas until they are dealt with. It is certainly not that I don't think about them any more once they are written down, but they move over to make room for other things that are being smothered up to that point.

This is probably one of the most random and different posts you've read here. But it is real and written from the reality of my moments today. Speaking of real, that is another word I would use to describe Jen's book above and October Baby and my sister and I am loving all three for this very thing at this moment.


Bonnie said...

I've just a minute, but I wanted throw in my $.02 worth about buying organic: Pray about it. Really. When I felt pulled strongly to start buying organic, my first concern was the expense, however after praying, and gingerly stepping out to do so, I found the Lord blessing my decion. I'm actually spending less! Now granted, I make everything from scratch, so I'm not paying the high mark-up on processed organic foods, but still, organic produce and meats are (for us- soon to be a family of 7) very budget friendly, not to mention they taste so much better! So my point is this, pray, and ask the Lord how you can best utilize your grocery budget to feed your family as healthy, safely (when I can't buy organic, pray against the garbage that may be found in/on what I'm buying!), and local as possible, He will guide you!

Mellyanne said...

Guess I'm going to have to look for that book. I seriously can see where you are coming from on every point! Thank you for your post. Please do share your final decision on the organic food dilemma. :)

God Bless!

Mellyanne said...

I am so pleased you shared your random thoughts with us! I can completely relate to all of them! Please let us know when you reach your final decision on the organic food dilemma! I've been struggling with that one for a year or two now! Going back and forth.

God Bless!

Mom said...

Oh how I loved reading these thoughts and knowing some of what is going on in your head and heart! :) I'm so glad you had a fun and special visit with Carrie and family. I'm thankful you are safely home, even though it was later than you expected. And I'm looking forward to seeing you in a few days! :) Love you, Mom

Meagan (Eco on the Go) said...

Although I always love the beautiful pictures you post on your blog, this has been one of my favorite posts to date! You definitely have a knack for writing! You should publish more posts like this one!

asnipofgoodness said...

Wow, I looked up on my reader 3 TIMES to be sure I was reading The Homespun Heart! Thia post was so different Minica, but I really really liked it. I felt like I was hearing from the real Monica, not the edited out version, and although the edited version is one I LOVE and read faithffully, the unedited Monica is equally beautiful and wonderful, and compellingly real!

Sheila said...

I really like this post. I can really relate more to thoughts like this. :) Although I did double-check my reader to make sure I was reading the blog I thought I was!

Kellie said...

I love this post. So real and true and I too struggle with food choices being better/cheap. Can't wait to hear more about this and your trip. Thank you for such an honest, random post.

*carrie* said...

Aw, just had a chance to read this. I am so grateful for you. This truly was a special visit, and I appreciate your effort and expense in coming. Thanks also to those who enabled you to be here!

Is Food the first chapter? I forget. You've got a lot more "food for thought" coming! =)

Ami said...

I loved the book 7, too! I like the idea of Seven Sacred Pauses and hope to start implementing that routine.

Great post - I know how you feel sometimes when there's so much swirling in your head and it's just got to come out!


Kathy said...

oh I love this post!

Your monologue about the clothes was hilarious...thank you for being real!

and I'm struggling with the organic stuff...