I want to share it because it really and truly described my thoughts that night. I offer it as a prayer for correction where I need it. I wonder if it will encourage my children someday when they are discouraged as parents. Maybe it will even encourage them before then that I wanted to be a good mom and am praying for God's help to do so. And, I imagine many other moms will read this and shake their heads in agreement.
Tears fell as I neared the end of the poem - it was a pouring out of my heart on paper. I hope you won't think less of me for having these struggles - but even if you do, I pray that God will allow me to look past that and be open to His correction and change in my life.
My children need a mother.
Have you seen where she's gone?
There's a woman who lives here
but it seems playing is a bore.
She'd rather keep busy
it seems much better that way.
It's either that or
have lots of fiascos each day.
You know what she means, right?
Throwing fits, undue tears, obedience often equals a fight.
Whining, no sharing and even less caring
it goes only downhill from here.
So busyness seems much easier most days
but she can't help but feel guilt in her ways.
Why can't she enjoy examining a leaf, scooping dirt or dancing around?
Why not stop to bounce the ball, read a book, everywhere opportunity abounds!
She's selfish and lazy and really - afraid.
She selfishly tries to avoid all the conflict,
she's lazy at handling it right.
And not so deep inside she knows a list of failures
will surely give her a fright.
Now, don't judge her too harshly - she loves these children to pieces
and her heart's desire is to lead them to Jesus.
She plans fun things to do, but it seems never enough.
Her head and her heart often scream, "Just give up!"
She's tired, she's grouchy and her head really aches
and it seems her littles just take, take, TAKE!
Lord, I'm glad being a mother isn't easy
or I'd forget to rely on You.
Now, Lord, I do ask that You soften my heart
and lead me in ways that are true.
I want to enjoy my children, Lord,
my failures are all I see.
My children desperately need a new mother,
Oh dear Lord, please let it be me.
PS: Today, I'm especially praying for kind words and a pleasant attitude. It seems when I'm sleep deprived and pushed at by toddlers, these things don't come as easily as they used to.